The Right to Your Emotions
Updated: Apr 14, 2020
“You have every right to feel every emotion that surfaces within you”.
This is something I read today by the lovely Matt Khan and it was like a breath of fresh air.
I, like most people- feel as if I have no right to get angry or upset or even to be happy at times. We link conditions and circumstances to everything, blaming people for our anger or sadness, or having our happiness' life-line connected to the actions and words of others. Lately I’ve struggled to just feel. I’ve been fearful of what it means to admit I’m angry or sad. Fearful that admitting it will only drown me or smother me further.
But as Matt says, when you give yourself permission to feel and move beyond blaming yourself or others and just feel while stating “l am ____ because I am” then that emotion serves you. It heals you further. It lets in the light. It acknowledges you’re human but also that within you lies a power that creates worlds.
I never thought I could feel ‘negative emotions’ without erupting, yelling or saying mean things to others. I never looked at my eruptions as a sign of mistrust I have towards myself for not believing that I can just sit with an emotion, breathe through it and listen to what it’s saying. I’ve always suppressed my feelings and then, when I am literally a shell on the beach with a storm inside, I overflow, crashing and pulling anyone in my way into it.
Then, rather than light at the end of it, there is guilt. Immense guilt for ripping into another and injecting them with MY pain. So I promise myself to never do ‘that’ again. And that’s pretty much how I’ve seen ‘feeling’ anything negative.
As if it’s something to avoid.
Something sticky and rotting and toxic. Something that will taint you and your relationship, so it’s easier to sacrifice yourself by carrying it with you everywhere - Silent, stitched up, afraid of looking in people’s eyes, resentful of every word they say.
But today, I just felt. And I didn’t link it to anyone or anything. I am anxious because I am. I am angry because I am. And by just feeling these emotions while listening to them and loving myself in the process, they brought clarity, light and soon afterwards, peace. Because, when hold our own hand through the rough times, an inner guidance awakens within us. Sometimes we are given new insight into how handle a situation or person, other times we are simply comforted in knowing that we have our own backs, and just being there is enough for ourselves to just feel and move on.
So while we may live in a culture where emotions can be seen as weakness, tune out those voices. Don't judge your emotions, listen to them. Chances are they are trying to communicate something very important to you. The least we can do it listen, and see if a solution or arises. If not, watch that emotion disappear to the nothingness it came from, while you re-appear in the present, focused, content and empowered.